This post is sponsored by Earth's Best Peanut Butter Puffs but the content and opinions expressed here are my own.
Raising an independent child is something I'm truly striving to do. This may be hard to believe, since I mean, I've openly admitted I have an issue, at times, with being a helicopter parent... but it's something I'm working on, I swear. The thing is, even though it's taxing and sometimes down right maddening debating with a toddler - I'm always excited to hear her speak her truth and that is why it's all worth it. Every hissy fit over a tiny misunderstanding, every crocodile tear shed over a mishap, every little ounce of drama she creates... it's all tough to deal with at times, but it's all a great reminder that she's this amazing, magnificent, overwhelmingly awesome little person and she's just expressing herself.
How exactly have we encouraged Delainey to be more independent lately...? Here's the scoop:
The first step we took toward independence was encouraging her love of mysteries. She's really been into the idea of "vestigating" [see also investigating] all kinds of things lately and I'm 100 on-board with it.
From being curious about where electricity comes from to asking me to uncover a stone with her in the backyard, I've been going full force and encouraging her curious behavior in a healthy and productive way. Wanting her to solve the mysteries herself, I set her up for success and sit back and help when asked. I love watching her make discoveries and analyze situations and I've also seen her use those same problem solving skills in situations with her peers and sometimes even when she's negotiating with me.
Plus, we've learned new things and we've also solved some mysteries! Being a "detective" with my little firecracker is truly helping her come out of her shell and she's "blossomed", if I can humbly brag for a bit.
The next step we've taken on this path to independence is allowing her to call the shots.
Well, sometimes we let her take the lead, anyways. She doesn't "rule the roost", but she is often in charge of decisions that effect her, as we see fit.
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Another step we took to foster independence in our wild girl was letting her learn new things on her own.
We've struggled through worksheets in the past and I've tried coaching her on how to properly get a toy to work, but allowing her to completely learn to do something on her own has been life changing for us both. Instead of tears of frustration, we now spend our time peacefully waiting as she has decided she will be the one to feed herself, brush her own teeth, dress herself, etc. It may be time consuming and sometimes I have to redo her work, but seeing her satisfied with herself after accomplishing a great "feat", I'm not changing this for the world. That look of success and her absolutely beaming pride as she's accomplished a new task, there's nothing like it in the world.
The last step but possibly the most important step since it relates to all the other steps, is CONSTANTLY reminding myself to let go and let her live.
I mean, I'm still fully involved since she's a tiny little nugget in the scheme of things, but I try to let her do her thing more often than not, as I nervously watch every step from a far. With growing her independence, she's become truly her own person and I've had to let go even more recently and it's been such an amazing, bittersweet feeling. One of the many recent ways I've really had to "let it go" was allowing her to choose activities she wanted to do and watching her form her own friendships. It's been amazing to see who she is becoming, but man, no one warned me this all would happen so quickly. She went from a baby to this strong, capable little kiddo in the blink of an eye.
