April 26, 2017

9 Signs You're a Hot Mess Mama!

Hi, I'm Lauren... and I'm guilty of losing my cell phone around 30+ times a day, I hardly ever wear make up any more, & I sometimes embarrass my 7 month old kid already (as illustrated below).

And... I mean, I can't be the only one who runs around looking for my sunglasses while they are on the top of my head, right?

I've been asked lately about my life and how it's "so perfect"... and literally I laugh out loud each time. While my photos may appear somewhat perfect (some days), my mom brain is in full force so my life is anything but perfect... and well, today - today I want to make a stand. Today is about admitting I'm a hot mess.

Because let's face it, some moms are able to parallel park and they always have change for the meter, each and every time... and well, some mom's have a car with sand and Starbucks straw wrappers all over the back seat and they can't even park in their own garage. Let's just be frank, we all know where I land on that spectrum.

And... if you're questioning where you land on the hot mess mom meter, today is your lucky day... you found the post to help you identify yourself. BUT let's just say, if you're a true, genuine hot mess like me, you know it. You probably were a hot mess before you became a "hot mess mama", so this isn't anything new... it's just an evolution - at least that seems to be the case for me.

Your husband likely knows you're a hot mess (but luckily he still loves you), your kids definitely know you're the definition of a hot mess mama (but, again, they love you anyways), and well, most likely the other mom's around us know we're hot messes... but hopefully they won't judge us too harshly.

With that said here's 9 signs you're a hot mess mama. But, I'm going to go ahead and let you know right now... there's no shame in our game, my fellow hot mess mamas! It's okay to be a mess, we're all just trying to do the best for our babies. I'm just posting this for fun and games... and well, because I'm a hot mess and this is the type of thing we do. 😂

1. You live off espresso, coffee, or energy drinks (or the like) and could use a constant IV drip of something caffeinated. You take your habit seriously... and the barista at your local coffee shop knows your order by heart. With that said... uhhh, I'm not fancy, so my barista happens to be my hubby, but espresso is my life line.

2. You always have plans for the future... BIG plans. You are great at planning and maybe not so awesome at executing. You aren't the only one with this fault, I'm right there next to you with big dreams and a planner to write it all down in, but when tomorrow comes I'll still be making plans for the next day.

3. You try to multitask, but most of the time you're half-tasking. You spend time on the computer, holding your cell phone, with Netflix on in the background, and your ipod playing some tunes on your google chromecast, while trying to video conference. I'm totally a multi-tasker and some days I'm better at it then others.

4. You always think you have more time than you really do. That upcoming event, wowwww, that's like 3 weeks away... and then bam, it's tomorrow. THIS is my life - always. I swear I live in a constant time warp. *insert twilight zone music here*

5. On that note, you are definitely a hot mess mama if you still have Christmas gifts from the prior year once April hits. Okay, so uhhh, maybe I'm the only one in the world that STILL has my family's Christmas gifts stowed away... and it's the end of April. Now that I'm typing this up, it's official... they are going to be mailed out soon...

6. You have a wardrobe that consists of yoga pants and t-shirts... and dressing up is putting on your jeans. I can't be the only one that feels fancy when they bust out their H&M skinny jeans for a special occasion.

7. You've found unidentifiable substances on your clothing... and maybe even taste tested it to try and identify. I know I've definitely found avocado, num-num crackers, and all kinds of other odd substances on my shirt, thanks to my sweet little hot mess.

8. You're guilty of losing your phone, car keys, or anything else of importance, a couple times a day... and you'd likely lose your head if it wasn't attached. I'm so guilty of losing my phone... it's a constant battle. You'd think I'd learn to take it off silent, but then again, who wants to risk waking up a sleeping baby with a Beyonce ring tone?

9. You own one of those cups that says "SHHH! There's Wine in here"... and you mean it. I may or may not have wine in my cup at this very second. Do you?

Like I said, there's no shame in being a hot mess... luckily, our kids, friends, and significant other's still love us and at the end of the day, I think we all can agree, that is really all that matters. So go ahead and lick your finger before getting that smudge of old food off your kid's cheek and smile. Life is good, even if it is a little messy sometimes.

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